Aloha adj, the way it was explained to me when I first got sober... its like you have fallen down and skinned your knee, the skin hurts and is raw for awhile until it can heal and grow some new skin to protect it. Our brains work that way as well when we have consumed substances that kinda numb it. When it starts waking up the sparks fly. Its really a good place to be knowing that the brain is waking back up although its not fun to go through at the time. Be patient with yourself and know it does get better with time (and work.) I had a bad alcohol and IV drug problem but somehow have made it 34-years without needing to self-medicate with that stuff. Best wishes, hang in there!