Yeah I am definitely attempting to go that route. I would prefer to pretend it doesnt happen but that gets me in trouble with my avoidant personality. He struggles with depression and is definitely a bit bored or unsettled with his life so its hard. I want him to be happy and for me to be happy so thats why I want to try and be okay with this . I definitely need to learn to be assertive and put my feelings first which i am crap at due to the past abuse. Again thanks you for your replies and taking time to listen!