Thank you all Beyondtherainbow, Hooligan, ChaoticInsanity, and elevatedsoul.
All your responses are great. From what I am gathering here and combining my knowledge of her, I think she is stuffing her feelings deep and trying to bury them with addictions. No doubt we both have huge voids now.
I'm really struggling tonight with my desire to reach out again (co-dependency possibly). I know it will go south fast if I do. I just want her to know I am here, we miss her and I understand that she is confused and struggling too. That's my hearts desire, and it comes off as a bit needy perhaps. My logical mind says keep chugging forward one day at a time. Anyone taking a shot in the dark as to whether I will hear from her?
Beyondtherainbow, that is a gut wrenching story... I feel horribly you were put through that. I guess it's the price of being nice. nothing worse than having your good will abused.