Hi canders7,

I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time. I know it’s difficult to hear, but it’s not your fault. I’m not sure what happened exactly but just from your posting I can tell you’ve been hurt. We’re all so quick to point out our flaws and take the blame for things. For whatever it’s worth, there’s something that has helped me with ptsd and abuse related issues. When I find myself saying how bad I was and how it’s all my fault, I replace myself with a dear friend or small child that I know. When I imagine the act being done to someone other than myself, I usually get very disgusted and angry and want to beat the **** out of the person who hurt me. It’s an easier way to see how you had nothing to do with what happened and how that person was in total violation. And the part where you say that it wasn’t even that bad... if it hurt “you” than it was bad. And I’m so sorry you’ve been suffering from it. You have lots of love here. Keep sharing.

Super safe hug. ~ Bee

...and here's another umbrella to go along with Fuzzybear's.