A fellow contractor told me he lived by the precept, "it is easier to get forgiveness than permission." Im surprised you even tried to get accomodations as a contractor. Do you see a therapist? Seriously, you dont have to tell me about your parents - they are probably exactly like mine were/are. Im surprised you havent heard of me - according to them, im the first girl in the history of the world to do the horrible things i did. honestly, i feel your pressure. I used to take 2 - 3 months off between contract jobs just to sleep and decompress.