Thank you, but that's not really accurated. It is indeed my fault...I don't want to explain it's complicated, it's not about what I do, it's about what I don't do.
I get the feeling that those people don't really know me, but I don't let them know me.

I only blame myself, and I am aware about the way I behave. But the problem is that I can't change, not only by myself, I tried over and over and it didn't work.

And it's because I blame myself that it hurts even more. There's no way people will ever like me.