That's the thing I'm not happy or sad I'm indifferent and it's really effecting my relationship. Ie normally I'd be thrilled that my sister is having a baby Thursday but I haven't even called her because "it's just a baby". It's not "just a baby " it's her first child! It looks like I'm pulling away from my family because I'm so quiet and I'm sick of people asking me what is wrong when nothing is wrong.

I wish I was chasing mania.