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Old Jun 15, 2015, 08:32 PM
JustShakey's Avatar
JustShakey JustShakey is offline
WON'T!!!
 
Member Since: May 2014
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,576
My toxic core beliefs are similar. On some level I believe that I don't deserve to be loved like everyone else. I think that I have to work very hard and open myself up to all sorts of use and abuse to have any sort of old bone thrown at me. Like I have to pay back every small kindness tenfold or the other person will abandon me. Of course the opposite is true - the other person is made to feel uncomfortable and distances themselves and I end up believing that I didn't do enough and so the spiral continues.
I'm working on it. The first step is awareness.
__________________
'...
At poor peace I sing
To you strangers (though song
Is a burning and crested act,
The fire of birds in
The world's turning wood,
For my sawn, splay sounds,)
...'
Dylan Thomas, Author's Prologue
Thanks for this!
BayBrony, LonesomeTonight, unaluna