Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm feeling a bit relieved that I'm not the only one going through something so unusual and that at least it’s not something I’m making up on my own.

I can also totally relate to feeling disappointed that those imaginations can never be true. It used to be like this vicious circle where I’m depressed, start imagining and telling stories to others to feel as if it’s real and feel even more depressed and pathetic that none of it can ever be real and I’m leading a wasted life. At this point it has become such an unconscious process that I really don’t know which comes first – depression or imagination. All I know is it’s taking up all of my time and energy, making me feel lazy and procrastinating things that are important to my life. I really don't know what I'm escaping from.


Something like this is also so difficult to piece together and tell someone without guiltiness and shame overwhelming me completely. And I’ve been given pretty much the same advice as you got and it hasn’t worked because I think there are plenty of underlying issues. Unfortunately I’ve not been able to consult someone who can get to them and really understands what it is like to go through depression.