I know what you mean about never being given anything but a name for the disorder, or feeling like you are only a diagnosis to them. I've experienced the craze of self-hate and at time it seemed that I was only able to go further and further into hating myself. The thing that's helped me so far has been creating and fixing things. Sometimes I buy broken things just to try and repair them. I still don't love myself, but I can at least see myself as a somewhat productive human being, and that's where loving yourself all starts.