Well rose76 I was careful how I worded 'smacking' and not slapping. I only saw her once smack my one daughter while we were married. It was something about brushing her teeth. I was standing right there and said 'what in the hell are you doing!?' All the other incidents were after the divorce and I never saw that only heard of it. I got after her and it stopped. I say 'smack' because it wasn't a full hard slap, but never the less not right and not warranted. My ex's father who has some major anger issues has tried to smack as well, and that's where it all started from. As far as me dumping on my wife, I try to be careful and not blame everything and everybody else in any matter. I hate games and not getting to the bottom of things and the truth, maybe to a fault at times. My ex has changed so much and I think I have alot of DENIAL working here. My oldest daughter '13' who is getting left out has been depressed about it and we are very close. I am close and do alot with both my daughters. Part of the problem is I was diagnosed BP 1 and went into a manic episode, no major problems before that. I was very high functioning before the episode. I never cheated or abused in anyway even during the episode which is now suspected was maybe brought on by antidepressants. I just became very unpleasant towards her and think it was 15 years of pent up frustration that just blew when she pushed me too far. I voluntarily admitted myself to the hospital and then came the diagnosis. I was dumped in the hospital with no support. Within a year after the dx I was divorced, helping take care of 2 elderly I'll parents and death of one (my dad I found dead) within the year. My mother lasted 2 more years with alzhiemers. And that's only half of it.
My ex would use the BP1 dx against my in a minute. You know, she is a cold hearted beeytch I am talking to my oldest daughter and may try to get her some professional help soon. We talk alot and says I am only one that gives her support and listens. Mother just tells her to suck it up as she tells me. I help both with projects, activities, and we do a lot together. This summer I am taking them to Florida to get away for 10 days.