I'm 44 and I still yearn for a loving, kind, understanding, supportive mom. I glimpsed her a time or two growing up, just enough to let me know it was possible...but, well..

She saw me as the other woman.. and she treated me as such. Now she is still in competition with me.. .still jealous.. still two-faced..and still as emotionally incompetetent as she always was... it took me years to figure out her incompetence.

I go from pity, to anger, to disgust.. and I love her too.. and i want her to love me back and mean it..Yet I know it will never happen.. so I guess that stays with ya... that sense of loss.

Anyway....