Unfortunately i got some bad news. Doctor told me that there is possibility that i have tuberculosis of genital organs. In that case i might be castrated and become infertile for life because meds are very useless in that case. I cant live with this information, im in constant stress, all the thoughts are related to it.
Problem is - required analyses take very long time. I wont be sure that i dont have it for another 3 months. How to live meanwhile? How to handle permanent anxiety if you have significant reason for it? I was very anxious person all my life, but now this got out of hand. I cant enjoy live with knowledge that i might have this disease. I even dropped smoking weed after getting high everyday for few years because i cant have any positive experience until i know that i dont have it. I would go to therapy, but i cant afford it. People would probably say "whats the point of thinking about something you cant change?" This line never worked for me. I always have been thinking even more about things that i cant change. How to adjust my mind and distract the thoughts from possibility that i have this awful disease?