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usually brainwashing is the reason people get angry and brainwashing is the reason blame themselves or something else for the anger...

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Welcome mr_imnot_crazy. I find the above interesting and quite self-revealing. You see, I can't agree, not for me. But I can see where it is true for you. Can you share more about why you feel this brainwashing is going on?

What if the pills really do make you more of what you are like, and that this you're feeling now, this anger is not who you really are? How do the pills make you feel?

I'm also curious about your ideas of how Jesus forgave. I am a Christian, as you may know if you've been reading in the forums.

Dr Clay will probably post for you this week, but in the meantime, would you share more with us here? ((hug))