Quote:
Originally Posted by orangebish
My new T is great, she's been really helpful, and I like working with her a lot. But. From the start she insisted that I call her Dr. And she calls me Mr. I didn't like it, I asked if we could just use our first names, but she explained it's her boundary (kind of) with all of her clients, and she wants it to stay that way.
It wasn't such a big deal for me at first, but now it's just driving me mental to the point I can't talk to her at all. When I think how I share some intimate things with this person and I still call her Dr. (sigh) I just can't do it. I've tried talking to her about this, but she won't budge. She thinks it's my resistance acting up or something like that. It annoys me so much, I even consider switching therapists.
How do you address your T? Do you have a T who prefers formal titles?
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I don't mind using my T's last name - it suits the way I want the relationship to be for me - it's symbolic, I want them to be a mentor. I call T Dr. First initial of last name and I called previous T Dr. Lastname.
However, having said that, it would drive me absolutely nuts to have them call me by my last name. That's *my* boundary. Only strangers call me by my last name. Previous T only addressed me by name once and she used my last name without any title. I wasn't brave enough to call her on it at the time and it's still a sore spot.
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'...
At poor peace I sing
To you strangers (though song
Is a burning and crested act,
The fire of birds in
The world's turning wood,
For my sawn, splay sounds,)
...'
Dylan Thomas, Author's Prologue
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