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gerber said:
But in the end the thing i wanted most was to have my feelings HEARD, or to KNOW that they have been heard. And now i think maybe he was giving me more of that that i acknowledged...or could acknowledge.

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Okay! Good thing to know, that can be corrected! The only way you can get out of the middle of the messy feelings is to slough your way through them toward something that looks like dry land! He can/will still give you that! He is merely addressing what he sees, not "judging" you on it. If it looks/sounds angry then it looks and sounds angry, that's all -- it's not a crisis, that is just being acknowledged! You want to be heard and you are getting heard but it's not going to be an easy process, got to get all that muck off first :-) I think you're doing fine, Gerber.