The lady pdoc I just started seeing is extremely emotionally flat. I felt like she was thinking of me as a joke, or feeling impatient towards me, judging me, not really listening. But within a couple days of the appointment I also started having thoughts that she hates me and she is going to try to make me nuts by giving me the wrong medications and she just wants to mess with my brain. I felt convinced that she WANTS me to go crazy and wind up in the hospital, I imagined her smirking about it. I felt extremely worked up and anxious and angry. Then a few hours after that and some Xanax I figured all of it is probably my paranoia flaring up really bad. It really sucks to not be able to trust your own perceptions.
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