Yeah I refused to quit working just because of episodes, as well. Then I went crazy and lost my job anyway. I hope this does not happen to you, but try to keep things in perspective. It is normal to desire to be a productive member of society and earn your own money. Most people who have to go on disability do not feel very good about it. But it is better to willfully take a break than to say, completely lose your **** one day at work and get fired.