Thank you for all the input and advice. She said she didn't think I needed something "heavy" like lithium, then suggested Abilify. I had told her about my symptoms and especially that lately I have terrible insomnia, have been seeing things and am extremely agitated all the time. Then I went home and researched Abilify and the negative reviews, almost all of them were complaints of how it made them feel even more agitated, restless and aggressive. Some reported that they became violent. I just feel like I am about at my limit in terms of containing how I feel all the time. Some days I just want to smash all of the dishes and scream at the top of my lungs. I really don't need anything that might make me even more agitated and wound up. So the Abilify just seems like a terrible idea.

I also got the feeling that she wasn't take me all that seriously, because I am not fully into an episode right now, it started a few weeks ago and is still only moderate. I was able to sit there and speak steadily, I wasn't acting furious. I was being polite and docile. Compared to some of the people in the waiting room I probably didn't seem that severe of a case. But what am I supposed to do, just let loose and smash something on her desk in order to get a proper medication. It's very frustrating.