Quote:
Originally Posted by cashart10
I used to hear the "Holy Spirit" inside of my head when I was SUPER manic and delusional and it definitely was not my voice. I obeyed the voice (and did some bizarre things). I thought it was an auditory hallucination until Friday night when I started having auditory hallucinations outside of my head. Do I think they are real? Well everyone on here and my husband have told me enough that I believe it (I think) but it was terrifying. Still when I see this album cover I feel terror believing it is the bizarre looking woman on the cover talking to me. It .gives me butterflies and makes me feel sick.
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Faces trigger my paranoia very badly when I am having an episode. Right now there is a box of hair dye on my desk, and the woman on the front of the box looks at me every time I pass by. Then when I have mild visual hallucinations, nothing really startles me
unless it has a face, then my heart about leaps out of my chest.
But what confuses me is that I
know that I am hallucinating, I
know that I am having paranoia, I
know not to take it seriously. So it feels really stupid to bring it up to professionals. Like we would both just agree that yeah it's not real, moving on. Then there is also the constant and incredibly uncomfortable feeling that they won't believe me and will think I am full of it. So I would rather just leave it out and get the medication I need anyway.