I work with the word "critical." My T said I was "kind but critical." I think criticism and judgment and discernment are all similar and all important. Solomon was a Judge and we certainly wouldn't badmouth him :-) even though he suggested the mothers should split the baby.

I guess "intent" has a lot to do with it all. I can be critical of my choices or make a critical choice so things don't go wrong but people are not "things" and I don't think should be treated as if they are. They can't be lumped into all-or-nothing categories or "organized" according to how we would like things to be. They're not all bad or always hurtful and it is rarely a good idea to cut people out of our lives as they are in our lives somehow and what we are cutting is part of our life! We do violence to ourselves when we slash and burn other people, even when we're reacting to what we think they are doing to us.