I also look well no matter what.you going to write a long post generally because this matters to me a lot. I have avoided inpatient for well over 3 years. a new state. and I have been inpatient to times within the past 6 months. my experiences both times with the same teams we're completely different.

the first time all I said was "I am psychotic I need my meds changed." I was there for 4 days and they completely changed my medication. it helped me a lot. I came home too depressed husband, and son who hadn't taking his medicine in 3 days, and a destroyed house. luckily I was well enough to get back on track and get my husband and son well. unfortunately the medication put me into a depressed state instead of normal. instead of going in again when I realize that I was in trouble I waited until my psychiatrist was going to commit me involuntarily.that time I was in for 10 days it really did that help. but since I was in there I was able to think about my family and how it is not my choice to commit suicide.I don't believe it is selfish as everyone was telling me but I do believe that its not my choice its a family choice and I'm not allowed to make decisions not affect my family without their input. the second time I was inpatient I had written a note to tell my Dr exactly what I was thinking. I was told to hand that in when I went to the er. I handed it over at triash and was admitted. it was extremely hard for me to be admitted the second time because I know the outside world explodes when I'm not there. however if I'm not well or dead I'm not there. it's not fair to you that you feel like you can't get help solely from outside sources. it's not fair to your family that you are sick. and it's really not fair that you have to go through this anguish. you need to give impatient a second chance to save your life and make you well. you need a fresh eye on your medication. I'm not saying that you're going to get out anytime soon but you need this and your family needs this. if you do not want to say that you are suicidal then go in and say I'm psychotic. those two little words will get you in. I'm not saying its not hard, I'm not saying that your husband is not going to have to find someone to take care of your children while you were gone. is FMLA an option for him currently. I know it will cause financial troubles but it'll help you get well and then go help you get your needs met. I'm sorry I don't trust your current Dr. I feel that he heeps medication on top of medication. inpatient will add and subtract medication to what you need. I never went inpatient I would not be taking a shot right now that has stabilized me. this is your chance to get a complete overhaul of your medication to a cocktail that helps. you need to take this opportunity psychosis can get really bad really fast. you don't want to hurt yourself or your family and the best way to prevent that is inpatient. you can go back to your doctor after it but currently you need new eyes and help finding a new psychiatrist if that's what you choose. I don't hear anything about your therapist anymore so I don't know where he or she stands on how you're doing. you look well but you're not. take the stuff that you sent you psychiatrist because it's already in your file, take it to the er and handed in. this is the easiest way and the most helpful wayfor you to get your needs met. take it from someone that is always on that side of the fence, I'm "always well", I never need intervention, I'm the rock , the glue that holds my family together. I think you in the same situation it wasn't for PC I would not have gone too inpatient twice. and I expect them to kick my *** next time I have to go inpatient. so this is me kicking your *** to the ER.