You clearly need to leave, move on, and be happy with men because that's what clearly makes you happy. She deserves someone who wants her. The both of you do.

The more you push yourself through this, the more you supress your true feelings.

You love her, but you're not in love with her. If you care for how she feels, then leave, because the longer you drag this out, the more pain youre going to bear on her mind, as well as your kids.