Quote:
Originally Posted by mike1127
I think it's unavoidable that a client suffering from the woundedness of not getting childhood emotional needs met will, for a period of time, become dependent on the therapist. I am thinking about becoming a therapist myself and I believe that one thing I need to train for is how to handle a true and serious dependence on the therapist, because I think it is a necessary stage for healing.
I do not think that all styles of therapists train to handle the client dependence. Sometimes a therapist will emphasize the value of independence and self-reliance, and of course those are good things, but I wonder if they are missing part of the picture.
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My T has the same view as you - that if you didn't get your childhood needs met, that some dependency is inevitable.
She does schema therapy in which there's the concept of "limited reparenting" where the therapist gratifys some emotional needs within the boundaries of a therapeutic relationship.
The goal is eventual increasing autonomy and independence rather than dependence or counterdependence.
So she says it's ok to depend for a while on the T (like a crutch) until the client is ready to stop leaning on crutches.
So she says she'll never give something she'll eventually resent giving.
But I also wonder if she'll "take things away", eg hugs, because the ultimate goal is after all, client autonomy.
I guess my fear is - who determines when that necessary time period of dependency is over?