I have a good relationship with my T and I'm confident that she's there for me if I need her. She accepts emails from me and has for the 6 years I've been seeing her, with no change. I've actually been emailing less these last few months, as my symptoms get under better control and I'm more able to talk to her in session. That's great progress for me.

Now - T is on vacation for the next 4 days. I know she won't be checking emails. She told me in our session on Tuesday that she will be completely unavailable Thursday through Sunday and gave me her backup's information. At the time, I was totally fine with her not being available. Didn't bother me in the least - we talked a little about her vacation, and I told her that I hope she has a great time.

Today, the first day of her vacation, I desperately want to send her an email. I don't even have anything specific I want to write to her - I just want to send her an email. I won't. There's no point in sending her something that she's not even going to see until next Monday morning. There's nothing urgent I feel like I need to tell her. So what is up with this sudden urge to email her? Especially knowing that she's not going to read it any time soon. Why in the world am I having to fight this urge to email her when I know that if she were not on vacation, I wouldn't feel the need to email?! This is so frustrating!!!!