I agree with you, I go in spurts. I also have bipolar disorder and sometimes it's a fine line between wanting to console others and also trying not to be too affected. I sort of move around on different forums periodically. Real life is a bit more difficult because I get really paranoid of people. It's like a weird bipolar paranoia + trauma issues combo.

I just can't make sense of this particular issue. I've never felt prolonged rage and resentment towards my physical abuser. I usually saw my father as like, a beast, but not as a human. I've always teetered emotionally with my mother, though. I try to see good in her and forgive her and try to see it in ways that paint her as a victim, too, or something, but there is always that crazy rage lurking around.