T got back from vacation today and he called me.

You see, just before he left we had a really heavy session LOADED with transference and I panicked and told him I didn't believe he would come back. He said it had to do with my lack of object constancy.

We talked on the phone before he left and he said he would call when he returned to let me know he was back. I didn't believe he would.

I wrote the poems you saw in the other thread. But I also wrote a series of letters, each one progressively more doubtful of the relationship or his return. In the last letter I was positively po'd.

I had pretty much decided that if he didn't call today, as promised, that I wouldn't have to return to his office.

I am so glad he called, and feeling so cared for. I am new to this, but if this is how we heal, then I am stunned....people actually caring for me? Hmmmm, not something I am accustomed to.

So, now what do I say when I see him? I certainly can't tell him how angry I am.