This isn't only with dating, it's also with friendships.

It's a pattern I've noticed while dating though, I start getting MORE scared as the relationship intensifies (mostly emotionally, not necessarily physically although after physical relations I tend to feel a bit awkward in the relationship anyway). Usually the longer you're in a relationship with someone, you're supposed to feel more comfortable - I don't. I start feeling like "the other shoe is going to drop". Or I begin to feel like they're going to soon notice something about me that they really dislike and they eventually won't want to be with me. I'm not sure where this feeling comes from. In the past I have sabotaged my relationships, like for example, I'll distance my communication with them. When this happens, I feel relief. But eventually I'll lose that person and then feel almost immediate regret as if my actions have suddenly dawned on me. What is up with my fear of emotional intimacy or commitment? I have been hurt in the past before but intellectually I know that shouldn't affect my future relationships. How can I stop myself from pulling back and allow myself to be fully open in a relationship with someone? Its kind of terrifying. I'm able to put on a happy face during the beginning of dating someone but like I said, it gets more and more uncomfortable for me as time progresses until I practically have a meltdown and break up with them. I make it very hard for the guy to actually get close to me or really know who I am completely. There's nothing inherently wrong with me so I don't know why I'm ultimately doing this. Self protection I guess? But not really, because it takes away my happiness too.

This problem became really evident to me last year when I broke up with a great guy for basically no reason. How do I break this cycle? Does anyone else out there experience something similar?