almedafan, that sounds like a very intense session. How very dedicated and caring that your T agreed to do this one timer with you and your brother. You know your T did that for you because he cares so much about you, don't you? I could easily see a T not wanting to do that since it is a one time thing only and lots of potential for opening cans of worms and solving nothing. But it sounds like your T did a skillful job with it.

It also sounds very hurtful to me--some of those things your brother said. I have had a similar experience with my husband in therapy, that he can say some really, really hurtful things that just knock me out. Things he has never said to my face outside of therapy. I think it is to the therapist's credit to create that safe space where people can say stuff like that. It was certainly amazing how your brother opened up and said stuff instead of just sitting there, feeling shy, and not comfortable enough to get to some issues. In some ways, it is almost like it hurts more to hear those things from my husband in T's presence because it makes me so vulnerable, not just to my husband but to my T, that he is hearing this stuff. And I have wondered if my husband knows it will hurt me more, be more potent, if he says this stuff in front of T. The flip side is that he has also said some really nice stuff to me in therapy, and he doesn't say that stuff outside of therapy either. Family therapy is a mystery!

I cringed when I read what your father said to you about taking your husband's side in a divorce. ((((hugs))))

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My T was mad when I told him what my dad said months ago.

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I am glad he got mad on your behalf.

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This is just more threats and brainwashing by my dad to not leave my husband because HE doesn't want me to. My husband is good for my family but may not be right for me.

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almedafan, I hope you will not let your family's opinion of your husband sway you one way or another. It doesn't matter what they think of him. You are an adult and they do not control you. It is your marriage and only you know its highs and lows and what you might do in the future. Frankly, if my family members chimed in with their uninformed opinions, I would tell them to butt out.

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The whole thing is very scary. It just confirms for me that I'm alone except for my son and sometimes my husband when he feels like being my husband...

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almedafan, it is important to develop a support network so you have people you can turn to. It sounds like maybe your family will not be part of this. Your brother and father at least are not supportive. How about your mother? Any other siblings? Besides family, a support network should include friends. If you don't have close friends who can provide support, that is an area to develop. Hope I'm not getting too CBT on ya...

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Someone on here mentioned about not being able to see their T's face outside of session.

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My daughter is that way with her therapist.

You were brave to do this, almedafan. I hope it was useful to you.