Quote:
|
"What seems to be of central importance in the symptoms and difficulties mentioned above is that the hallmark of the "borderline" personality is great difficulty in holding on to a stable, consistent sense of one's self: "What am I?" these people ask. "My life is in chaos; sometimes I feel like I can do anything—other times I want to die because I feel so incompetent, helpless and loathsome. I'm a lot of different people instead of being just one person."
|
I got that from the sticky "
Borderline PD symptoms description"
I've been diagnosed twice with BPD, once when I was 12 (which seems impossible to me from my research), and again when I was 21. I've doubted it my whole life, but as my insight has improved, I see that I've been in denial. There's no doubt I suffer from BPD. There's two things I have issue with, though.
One is dealing with my therapist. I've only been seeing him since January and he doesn't know a LOT about me and my inner world, hell, I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to be talking about in therapy. But I did mention my BPD diagnosis to him and he simply shrugged it off and basically said that personality disorders are messy and often mis-diagnosed. I don't know how to approach this subject with him because lately it's been getting so much worse. I had it under control for a few years, but now.. Things are just BAD.
Specifically, dissociation.
My second issue is discerning the difference between Dissociative Identity Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder. I'm really lost when it comes to myself and I often switch from one type of me to the next. I never sync up with what others view, I often ask questions about myself in order to gain some form of clarity. I daydream constantly, I can't get out of my head.. And when I do start thinking about the possibility of alters, while excited to explore myself, I panic at the thought, though I don't know why.
What is going on? What should I do?