Quote:
Originally Posted by SkyscraperMeow
I'll be honest, I don't think people replying to you have actually read your full post. Your therapist is breaking A LOT of standard boundaries and throwing up A LOT of red flags. She's a red flag factory at this point.
Lingering hugs, saying she doesn't think she'd ever get over losing you, calling you her favorite client, wanting to come to your wedding...
These are not things that most therapists do, because it creates an unhealthy experience for the client. What you're experiencing isn't normal, standard therapeutic transference. It's way, way, way more than that and has been enabled and encouraged by your therapist.
Maybe it's because you're so young and she genuinely wants to mother you. She probably does genuinely care, but it does seem like you could be in a less than perfect position because of the odd boundaries.
Sorry you're in so much pain.
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Not surprising really. I mean, it's a freaking long post, I don't blame them for not reading if they didn't.
I've been really hoping she does feel that way about me actually... Which is actually one of the reasons why I posted this...My my dream is for her to actually love me like a mom. I smiled really big when you said "she probably does genuinely care...wants to mother you". Which probably is just making me look more ridiculous and obsessed.
What do you mean by red flags? Like, I never felt uncomfortable around her or anything at all. I swear. I didn't think she was doing anything wrong, I thought it was just me and I was looking for a way to keep my own transference under control. What are "standard boundaries" anyways? I mean, I know us hugging isn't always normal but she said it's not unusual and okay if the client is okay with it. She said there is nothing wrong with it.
But I think it's my fault, because I asked for the hugs and sort of, back handedly, said things to lead her in that direction, because otherwise she would of never said those things. Or done them. She is too professional... I had a therapist when I was 9 who was REALLY unprofessional (like, said that I was going to go blind from masturbation, and was in general a sack job) so I have comparisons... I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for her.
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