Hi, I've come back, now I'm in a better place than yesterday and can read more carefully.
I can relate to a lot you say, and many other people here will too, I know. I was quite explosive as a teenager and still experience strong emotions now. I even hit my sister and left bruises which shames me to this day. There is help out there to help us understand ourselves and cope better. I have recently been told I have Emotionally Unstable Personality Traits, meaning I have some of the symptoms of Emotionally Unstable Personality disorder, keep reading please, this diagnosis, sometimes called BPD or Emotion Intensity Disorder sounds very negative, but simply means that you feel emotions very deeply and that makes your life HARD. I recently attended Stepps programme which explained a lot of things and gave me a lot more skills to survive. It was also obvious that the other people in the group who all had similar issues to what you described were also some of the most caring people I've met. Feeling strongly also gives you the capacity to care intensely and understand and support other people. It is SOO hard to live with at times but also gives dimensions to our lives. If you get the chance to go for help, GO FOR IT. You clearly have the courage and it is possible to make a difference, you don't want to wait till you're in your 40s like me when everything is more ingrained. Good luck as you try to find a way forward, it will take courage, but people here want to support you. If you find a thread has a limited response, don't give up, post again maybe on another forum and the 'right' people will find you. Above all, don't give up on yourself, you're worth the effort!

Current diagnosis (labels) double depression, (dysthymia (long term depression, in my case over 30years) with severe depression on top) and Emotionally Unstable Personality Traits.
When depression is less, but still there, I generally have a decent quality of life.