You sound like you are really struggling. I'm sorry to hear that and wish you well. I have no experience with depression but am in the company of a loved one who does. Like you I seek some answers here and perhaps like me you will find some. My advice for what it's worth is to remember that depression may be clouding your perception. I notice in my son that depression colors his viewpoint and distorts his impressions of others and their relationship with him. You have a daughter and at 5 months they are a wonder. As she gets older she will need you more and you will become a very large part of her life. That in itself is worth your effort. You have much to offer her and your work to find a better place for yourself and her will be rewarding I promise you. That better place will help with your outlook and you may find that your perceptions were inaccurate. There is help out there and as a dad you owe it to yourself to seek it out. Good luck to you and the family that will benefit from your efforts!