That is a good point, I might try it. It's nerve-wrecking for me to try to explain it to people. They usually have WTF looks on their face as a reaction, and I can never even tell if they empathize or don't believe me or what. I hate having to try to 'fight for my reality' because it's a pointless, endless battle, bunch of stress for nothing. I think I might also feel ashamed or embarrassed about it, too. Probably old childhood wound issues. You know how when your parent rejects you as a little kid, you automatically assume it's because something is wrong with you. That sort of thing. Creates a lot of anxiety. I also just don't expect a pdoc to care about my personal life problems, only psychiatric symptoms. Don't want to be like crying on their shoulder about my messed up parents when they're not a therapist just a pdoc.

I don't want to be on disability in terms of rent and so on because I can survive without it while other people can't. But I definitely need a safety net for medication.