I am at my witts end, trying to think of what else I can do. I have started seeing a therapist, who for now, has recommended that I really just try to talk to my husband.

I was verbally and emotionally abused by my angry alcoholic husband, who has now been sober for 2 years. Although he doesnt drink anymore, he still very much has anger issues. I have tried and tried to keep my head up, but there is always something that I am doing wrong.

About 8 months ago, I started having panic attacks. They come at the height of emotional outlet for me. My husband has a high sex drive so whenever I would orgasm, there came another panic attack. I couldn't handle it anymore so I stopped even trying to get to the finish line. I couldn't handle the thought of constantly having attacks..... they are terrifying.

I still make myself available to my husband tho, but that isn't even good enough. He wants a reaction from me and it needs to be real. This kills me, I don't know how to handle it anymore. Nothing I do is good enough.