So, this is the situation. I dont have any gay sexual thoughts towards my male friend and i would never start eny step in that way. But i get erection with no reason when having a close contact with him or listening to his sexual details about his sex with girl. Sometimes i get erection when listening other friends talking about sex detailes but this is something else. He is my best frined for 4 years and this situation is awful couse i cant hug him or get in close contact with him. Really this has to stop in any way and i cant tell him that couse its weird even to me.

The main reason for this problem (i think) started when 2 of us were living in this small apartment for 3 months with only one big room and bathroom, and there were this 2 girls that were with us there a lot of time. I was not interested in this girl that suposed to be my sex buddy so we were only sleeping in same bed. but him and the other girl where getting in action every time. So i could not go away couse i was sleepeng there and every night when they were getting in action i woul have a huuge boner listening to them and latter the day after i was masturbating in the bathroom imagining them in action. and that happened a lot of time.

So now i think i developed some kind of sexual disorder and i need help, i really really need help about that. I love spendig time with him couse his my best friend, i dont have any sexual thought or desire about him. I dont have any reading/theory basis or psychological knowladge at all for this problem. but i would say This is some kind of relating sexual pleasure with the wrong subject/person. Also sometimes when i masturbate the picture comes in my head with the 2 of them even if its unwanted. I started to avoid close contact with my frined. this situation makes me sick ....i also avoid beeing with him and this girl (i dont want to change this couse its ok this way, to spend time only with him without his girl). I dont masturbate thinking about them for about a year.

How can i get ridd of this thing in my head? Can i delete it? Can i rewrite it? Will this stop or fade in some kinde of way with the time passing by?



I will describe myself little in detail so you can get some kind of a picture about me:
I am a male, 22 years old and i was waiting a long time to lose my virginity, even i am very nice and hansom etc.... really i had a lot lot of chances to lose my virginity but it took me a long time to found a right girl. Now i am not shure if that was the right thing to do, to wait for the right girl couse i lost my virginity 6 months ago with the wrong one and i feel its ok.

Since my puberty strated (12yrs) i had sexual desire to woman but i also had an gay thoughts and imaginations that i was thinking about when i was masturbating. really never a real desire but thughts. For me it was never a question if i am a gay or not couse i know that i am not. It stopped latter whern i was about 17. I had my early erotic experience thouching with my male friend when i was like 8-10yrs when we were playing with adult magazines and it was very pleasent memory so i think that is the thing that interrupted me in my "normal" early puberty development. i am 100% sure that i am not gay. even if i were gay that is not an option for me. I totaly accepted my self in that early puberty period and i am fine with it..its my way of development to come to this stage of beeing straight