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You are doing a great job thinking this out... you said..
but I think I am attracted to "who he may be".
Actions mean EVERYTHING. You can have some harmless "thoughts" without coming up with a romantic entanglement in your own head.
Find other things to think about - unless at one point - his actions show you who he really is... and then it still takes months to find out if it was real or was he on his best behavior.
Sorry you feel lonely. It's not helpful to idealize what you think might be going on with people who are in relationships... and that you might be missing out.
You can get passionate about other things... if some other time you do meet someone, you still have other things going on that mean a lot to you.
I hope you find other things that make your heart sing... and if it is a man... let him show you who he is through his actions!!!!!
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“A person is also mentally weak by the quantity of time he spends to sneak peek into others lives to devalue and degrade the quality of his own life.” Anuj Somany
“Psychotherapy works by going deep into the brain and its neurons and changing their structure by turning on the right genes. The talking cure works by "talking to neurons," and that an effective psychotherapist or psychoanalyst is a "microsurgeon of the mind" who helps patients make needed alterations in neuronal networks.” Norman Doidge
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