Stillintending, i am sorry, i probably sounded harsh. Like, do as i say, not as i did. Not hery helpful. I know the exact two moments when i was sixteen when i made the wrong decision - even as i was doing it, i knew i was making a mistake. I had youtube in my head, i can still see myself! Its very difficult and scary to claim THIS IS THE RIGHT THING FOR ME, but thats your job right now, to figure it out and go for it. Use your high standards FOR yourself, not against yourself.