Always been a loner and at this point I'm pretty set - like cement. I really can't recommend this unless you really don't want to be a human being - it's painful. Don't get me wrong I'm real good at this lifestyle because I've lived a long time and have not killed myself or anyone else. I can't tell you how many times I've told people that I was going to make an effort to get more people in my life but you know I didn't. I'm just too damn comfortable to even think about this anymore. This staunch individualism is probably going to take me to the grave early - oh well. Through the years of therapy and meds I never really took down the wall enough to be close to anyone. I never felt secure enough (still don't) to bring another individual into this isolated lifestyle - I live in Ice Station Zebra. It's hard to imagine anyone with any kind of social motivation staying with me long enough to bond. I'm not even sure why I'm writing this because I know that I'm going to the grave alone. I'm disappointed that I really never found a solution and that the screams were never heard. I don't expect any fortune cookie miracle at this point I just wish things could have been different.