For polyamory to work, it requires open and honest communication among all partners. Looking for someone else behind your gf's back is not really being open or honest. If the relationship is not working, then you need to communicate that to her. Tell her that you feel she is not talking to you and ask for more of her time-- or break up with her. Looking for someone else behind her back is a pretty shady and immature thing to do. It is not healthy to stay in one relationship while looking for another. You really need to resolve things with this gf BEFORE you start looking for another. It's not fair to your current gf and it would be unfair to any future gf. How can you ask more of a new gf than you are willing to offer to any of your partners? If you aren't being respectful of them, how can you ask them to be respectful of you? No one who is healthy is going to be okay entering into a relationship with you while you are still involved with other people with whom you are not being honest and have not resolved your business.