I don’t even know if i can type a long message. I have struggled with an ed and depression/ anxiety as well as self harm for ~ 5 years now triggered mainly by my abusive and manipulative family. I am currently home for the summer and I am having a hard time keeping perspective being surrounded by my toxic family. Additionally, I am in the closet about my sexuality which is causing more stress (my family is very conservative and christian). Because of my depression I have lost one of my best friends. I am pretty much in love with my other best friend but they do not reciprocate the feelings. I have recently relapsed in my ed and I want to start self harming again… I am feeling very down and losing pretty much all hope. This is probably really disjointed and lacks a lot of detail but idk. I feel very disposable and unimportant because in all honesty I am. I am a burden to my family and people do not like me (i have one friend at this point— the one i love). None of my passions matter to me anymore either and even if they did I feel like im always in a dissociative state so I never feel “there” idk im just looking for an ounce of light.