Alex,

Yes, well I have not been able to express my anger prior to this. So yesterday was really a first for me. I know the anger is there. It is really the root of depression and SI.

It is difficult to access the anger particularly when I use the defense that you mentioned, the "why bother" deal. I really, really get that.

Having trouble mustering up anger today but feel sometimes that the anger takes other forms such as just wanting to quit, etc.

Hope all is well with you.