I don't know if this sounds the same but I understand..
Reading your post I cried and got chills because I know exactly how that feels.

My mother never really left me but she passed away when I was a child then when my mom passed away my father wasn't there for me and my sisters emotionally because my father was very lost.
My mom passed away when I was 10 and now I am 22 and when I look at other children I still till this day try not to cry when I see parents with them.
I felt like the whole point of a childhood is to be with your parents.
Even though I had a "somewhat childhood" my childhood was snatched away from my life.
and till this day I still struggle with my past and try to hold tears.
Sometimes I find myself in thought and angry because of life.

It never gets easy and that's the truth. You will always feel some type of way of what your parents been through. But, know that youre not alone and that one day you will get married and you can give your CHILDREN everything that you couldn't have.

You will be a good parent and your children will love you.
Children's love is so different than any type of love. and you will see that one day.
When there is darkness there is light.
There will be days that you will be sad but there will be better days.
Life is not perfect... people like us just have to take it day buy day.
and I know its easier than said... because I struggle too.
but there will always be a tomorrow.

I am reaching a hug for you within spirit.
you deserve a lot of love in your life.
hopefully one day you will be able to not get over it but to see that your a special person because of what you been through.
things happen for a reason.