I'm amazed that I received so many responses and glad that many if not all of us can relate to each other. It gives me comfort to know that I am not the only one feeling like this on a every day basis.
Isolation is one of the things that will be the most difficult to change if at all even possible. I doubt and I'm not even sure if i can. My T has also emphasized the negative impact of my isolation to me in my recent couple of sessions. I grew up having extreme difficulty socializing, being/becoming extremely introverted, having a severe negative self image/poor self esteem, etc. Growing up as a child, I also became someone who really hates burdening/bothering other people which isolates me from the world even more. This is, which my T recently pointed out, most likely a result of my childhood and the way I grew up within my family and the household.
I do have a dog. She is the most important thing to me more so than even my own family. She means the world to me especially as I don't have friends, etc and is a huge significance in my life. But I've been feeling incredibly guilty because I have to keep her outside ever since I moved back with my family and I hate myself for it. When I used to live on my own, she was always close to me and even slept beside me. Sometimes she is the only thing that is standing between me from taking my own life but other times I really hate myself because she deserves far better than me and deserves a better home/family.

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk