Quote:
Originally Posted by CBDMeditator
You're the only authority here on how you feel, so I'll defer to you on those matters.
What I will extend is the possibility that you haven't had those emotions appropriately stirred with therapy or drugs yet (there are a deluge of drugs that can induce empathetic neurochemistry). And even if if it's exactly as you say, and you're somehow incapable of empathy, that doesn't somehow make a content life mutually exclusive. I've had periods where I was non-empathetic, but still had the time of my life.
Plus, I'm guessing you're pretty well incentivized to behave in appropriate ways to ensure your continued happiness. I heard a guy over in the NPD section at Psychforums call it his "punitive conscience," meaning he was well controlled by laws regardless of his lack of empathy, so it all shook out evenly in the end.
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For a long time due to my horrible childhood I shut off my emotions all together. That plus having early onset schizophrenia(a blunted affect is part of my symptom cluster)... Yes, it did make me appear socio/psychopathic.
I am in therapy, and while I will never be an empathetic person, I can work on behaviors I know are holding me back and keeping me from having meaningful interpersonal interactions. My motivation is that I do not want to end up like the Narcissists who raised me, they both wound up miserable and alone. I do not want to suffer that fate.
I have modified much of my behavior as is. I am far more content, so whatever I am doing inside and outside of my therapist's office is working. I do not wish to "change" in the sense of becoming an empathetic ray of light. But I do not want to stop growing as a person, ever. I want to be better than the Narcissists responsible for my childhood. I want to rise above that. It is beneath me to act as they both did. So of course, my motivations aren't altruistic but alas, it is the nature of my disorder.
Your posts are always an interesting read, it's nice to see a new face here.
