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Old Jul 14, 2015, 10:46 AM
dysphoricspirit dysphoricspirit is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2015
Location: Closer to you thank you think
Posts: 61
my hair started to visibly thin. I'm 24 now and I have really thin hair at the front. I look several years older. I'm ridiculed and bullied by my friends, I no longer wish to be in touch with old friends because they insist on reminding me of my shortcomings.

I developed a habit for picking my scalp when I was around 15, I would pick my scalp, dig with my fingers for pieces of scalp, flakes, the bigger the 'flake', the more comfort it would give... it's hard for me to describe, but I liked touching it and feeling it. Sometimes strands of hair would come out with the flakes i'd pick and it would make me feel even better, like 'wow look, a hair' without even giving a thought about the destruction I was causing to my appearance. I would group all the hair and flakes together, touching it felt really good.

I stopped about 4 years ago, but it persisted for a few more years, I'd do it occasionally, but I have completely stopped it now.

I feel so stupid now. Back then I even saw a show on trichotillomania on TV, but never realized I had a similar problem. Now I live in regret. I wish I could go back in time and tell my younger self. I really, REALLY care about my appearance, it matters to me a whole lot, and even though sometimes I can see that I'm still fine, I feel hideous most of the time.
Hugs from:
TimTheEnchanter
Thanks for this!
TimTheEnchanter