My goodness, Lambakins, she uses "shame and guilt!" Aren't you the magnanimous soul to return her so much attention, despite that. But you see, she keeps using it because it works. There is an old saying: "We teach people how to treat us."

Long, drawn-out crying jags! What a pain. Here's an option: When the hysterics start, tell her - "I'm going to get off the phone, so you can calm down. Our talking is definitely triggering you. So go take it very easy for a half an hour. Then I'll call you back to see how you're doing." Then get off phone. Then do call her back, but insist that it's best if she gets her mind off the stuff you were talking about, so you'll be getting off again to let her relax.

I don't know. Might not be such a hot idea at that.