((((((((((((FindPeace)))))))) I so understand the crying parts. It's so hard when those parts are triggered in my head.

I'm so sorry that the memories coming back are disturbing you. Try to do self talk if you can that it is in the past. You already survived it. I know it doesn't feel like it at the time though. I think I read in another post that you were quitting T because of this? I hope if that is true, that you will reconsider and get the support you need.