I didn't know if this went here or in Self-Esteem, so if this is the wrong spot - please move it.

I'm a psych major. I'm currently taking Abnormal Psychology and for the first (past) 3 classes now - I feel abnormal, icky and just like a general failure as a human being.

She (my prof) talked about cognitive distortions today. I could have literally cried in class. She kept saying these things and she wasn't portraying anything in a good light - so now I feel even more %#@&#! up. I know I could have left class because it was just bugging me that much - but come on, how many people who are depressed don't have some sort of cognitive distortion? She used examples about what a depressed person thinks to themselves (sometimes) and I could have raised my hand and told her she was describing me. First class she briefly touched on SI - which upset me to no end. This class is going to be interesting - but at the same time, I think I'm going to get hurt in the process.

I so entirely wish now that my T saw me more often than every two weeks. One week today, could be worse I suppose.

Going through a rough enough time. He actually told me that he'd like to switch me to Mondays (he works Mon & Wed only) so that when I have a crisis I could see him twice in one week. I'd appreciate it so much if he would - but I want to keep that 9am spot. It's MINE. Mine mine mine. Seriously, I get overly jealous if I have to take another time spot. I feel ridiculous for saying that. God I wish everyone was that nice to me. I could have cried, because he actually seems to get a lot - even if he says some things that bug me to no end. But is that therapy? Getting under your skin? I guess so.

I'm already making a mental list of everything I want to say to T ... so much to say, so little time. I know what he's going to want to talk about though and I dont wanna.

Blah. Learning psychology stuff is fun and interesting and I feel better knowing what I'm going through - but then I feel stupid for not being able to "fix" myself. It's giving me headache seperating my reality from the stupid textbook.

... end random note from me. Sorry, I had to say something - this is driving me bonkers.