So life is hugely stressful right now. I'm trying to rejoin the work force again this time with dedication. My husband and I are moving 3 hours away. I've had the sole responsibility of coordinating the move, finding an apartment with a pitbull, signing leases, managing finances with a shoe string budget. Packing and down sizing from a 3 bedroom house with a shed, to a one bedroom apartment. Arranging utilities on and off. Moving truck blah blah blah. This whole move is basically moving me into a city with more resources and jobs. On top of everything I'm planning on divorcing my husband because he's a compulsive liar and emotionally manipulative.

A ball of stress, in a box of stress, on a shelf of stress, in the store of stress.

Honestly I'm doing way better than I thought I would. But my sleep is all but absent, I'm not manic or hypo manic. Stress immediately reduces the amount of sleep I am able to get. If my sleep stays compromised long enough I start to cycle, mania first then hypo then down the rabbit hole of depression. When I start to cycle my stress level grows exponentially, my sleep gets worse, then my symptoms get unmanageable.

I've been getting 4 hours or less of sleep a night for just over a month. I practice good sleep Hygiene, I've tried using white noise or music, tried taking melatonin, tried wearing myself out before trying to sleep. The only sleep medication I have is Ambien, and I can take up to 30mg and not be able to fall asleep for hours and still wake up in two hours and not be able to sleep.

I really don't want to start cycling, and I have a feeling packing the truck this weekend and doing the move this weekend is going to break down the feeble supports holding my BP at bay.

Does anyone else have a similar pattern?
Any ideas of what I can do differently?

Thanks for reading my novel, thanks for replies and advice in advance. J

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